What
the heck am I doing here? They'll find out I can't write and I'll be totally
embarrassed and...and...Wait, they are saying it's okay if I just want to listen
to their songs. I don't have to write a thing. I can just take a walk or nap
all day. Or I can try and write something. I don't have to show them any of my
ideas. I can sit in the sun or shade and just THINK about writing. Or, I can
take all the workshops offered, or I can just watch them write. I can do
whatever I want. If I should happen to come up with a song I can keep it to
myself or there will be an Open Mic and I can try my song out on them.
So
many options ...
WINTERSONGS WEST
2005
I
first heard about SummerSongs when I was going through one of the many music
magazines I scan daily and happened to see their ad. I went to their website
(www.summersongs.com) and found out this songwriting camp was based on the East
Coast, but they were also starting up camps (retreats) on the West Coast as
well. A weekend camp was coming up in January 2005. I was intrigued because
after 41 years of singing and playing the guitar Ð 20 of which I was making a
good living at it Ð I had a notion that I wanted to try to focus on writing
songs for a change. I still enjoy playing in cafes from time to time, but now I
wanted to have some originals to sing. I had made my living doing cover tunes
and happily so. I'd dabble in writing here and there but never seriously except
for one tune that I co-wrote with Diana Cox Harris, a wonderful writer. That
song got as far as Reba McIntyre's Semifinal 50 list for her new album, but it
didn't make the final cut. After that I just went back to my covers or, should
I say, under my covers?
For
some reason this Summersongs ad really drew me in. Maybe I was just ripe for
the ad at that time; there are no coincidences. The one coming up was a
three-day weekend retreat in Los Angeles. I could drive up there. I decided to
invite my son, Mike, who was 17 at the time. He was composing some of his own
instrumentals on guitar that were wonderful, and I thought he might enjoy
meeting these lyric writers. The camp's location was still up in the air, but
it was soon nailed down when one of the writers/instructors (Severin Browne)
offered his home for the weekend. And what a perfect home it was, an old
Spanish style hacienda Ð a mini-mission- complete with bell tower called the
Abbey. Built by Grandfather Browne back in the 1920s, this was the house where
Severin and his brother Jackson grew up. Although part of it was in need
of repair, it was nevertheless cozy in the space where we 'resided.' Situated
smack dab in an L.A. suburb, it is surround by homes built in the 1930s and
1940s, which there were very few of at the time the Abbey was built. A large
gate around the property had to be opened and closed as each of us showed up. I
loved it. It was all part of the new adventure I was on.
That
weekend I met some very talented and warm-hearted people, both teaching and there
to learn; I think there were about 15 attendees altogether. Most of us slept in
the big 'chapel' room in sleeping bags. The workshops were held in different
areas outside and inside the house. I thought it was amazing that Severin and
his wife would allow us to invade their home. Understandably, this would not be
the site for the retreat the following year, so I relished every minute there I
could. It felt like being in a castle in Ireland, a thought that kept coming to
me. There were large rooms, high ceilings, a very big fireplace, a huge pipe
organ in the 'chapel' room, and a hidden staircase to the cellar. Parts of the
house were a bit damp and musty, yet it was warm and friendly at the same time.
It was so wonderful I wanted to start writing. Most of the attendees came from
the L.A. area, several from Santa Barbara, a few of us from San Diego, and one
or two from the East Coast. There were attendees who worked in the arts, some
held blue collar jobs, and some worked in professional fields, all of us
different types who were there for the songwriting experience Ð our common
denominator.
I
really wanted to start writing and hoped I would actually come up with a song.
I HAD to...the environment was so perfect! I envisioned myself staying up for
hours surrounded by fellow students singing around the fire, however I spent
most of the time in my sleeping bag listening to them all sing these great
songs they had written. I drifted off to sleep as they were singing a new tune,
complete with beautiful harmonies.
Over
the next two days I took workshops on writing, harmony singing, vocal
strengthening, and guitar technique, all of which were really interesting. I
enjoyed being surrounded by music for a whole weekend without interruptions! No
having to stop and pay the bills, or go to the store, or answer the phone, or
clean the house Ð just musical saturation.
I
tried to write something that day and the next, but nothing came to me. I tried
singing a few tunes I had written long ago, but they just didn't feel right to
me at all. I tried singing some cover tunes (my comfort zone) but that didn't
feel right either. So I just listened for a change, I listened and learned. I
heard some great songs and I had some ideas that were just seeds, but I was
encouraged. No one was judgmental; there was only support. Mike enjoyed the
weekend too. He felt comfortable enough to try out several different workshops
on his own. He also went off on his own to play his guitar wherever he wanted
to.
When
we all left on Sunday afternoon I was surprised afterward to find how bonding
such a short amount of time was for us all (cringe cringe...sorry, I tried very
hard not to use that cliche. . nothing I can do about it though. We bonded).
That first night I felt like I didn't fit in at all, but by Sunday something
just caught up with me and I was really sad to be leaving these people.
Ironically,
I never wrote a thing at the first camp, but I was head over heels in love with
the idea of it all. I went home and stayed in touch with the gang via a Yahoo
Group site. I tried a bit of writing but nothing was coming to me... yet.
SUMMERSONGS WEST
2005
After
my experience at WinterSongs, emails among the attendees started to fly back
and forth. I soon heard about plans for SummerSongs West, a week-long camp in
June at El Capitan Canyon, a few miles north of Santa Barbara. Registration
cost a bit more this time: around $650. At first I just couldn't justify going,
having just attended the last camp (times two, because I paid for Mike as well)
so I wasn't sure whether I could afford SummerSongs too. But when I learned it
was the week I would be off work anyway, I felt the pull to go. AND...I could
drive there, which is always one of the deciding factors for me; not having to
spend big bucks to fly somewhere helped me justify other expenses.
I
registered. This time we could share a cabin with one or two others to help a
little with the cost. Since my idea of camping is a four-star hotel with wood
paneling, I was a little concerned, but I decided to relax and try to be okay
with roughing it a bit. Well, let me tell you, these cabins were my kind of
camping. Each cabin had two bunk beds, a small but very clean bathroom, and a
little kitchenette. And the bed! It was the most comfortable bed I've ever
slept in. I forgot to ask them what kind of mattresses and comforters they
were, but wow, I slept like a log. I had the perfect cabin mates too. I ended
up sharing the cabin with Renee and Jaynee, two pals I made at WinterSongs.
They are talented, hard -working gals who also have the best senses of humor.
We laughed so hard.....at everything!
On
the first day at camp there was an orientation and we received a packet of
information listing workshop choices and eating schedules. Open Mics would be
held in the evenings, so you could test your songs on a very safe and
supportive group. I hadn't yet finished a song by the first Open Mic, so I went
with a cover tune, once again reaching for my safety blanket. One of the
instructors, a super writer and great gal named Wendy Waldman, told me to just
go for it and do an original. I reeeeally wanted to, but I still was on shaky
ground with my originals, so I didn't. I wish I had. The good news is that I
could feel a new sense of determination to finish some songs there and do them
at Open Mic by the time I left. We had a campfire one night. All the guitars
came out and we sang every song we could think of. The group was so diverse
that a wonderful array of songs went flying by Ð not just your basic campfire songs
but any song we had ever heard in our lives, which made me happy that I knew so
many cover tunes.
Throughout
the week I participated in several workshops. At one we were encouraged to read
our lyrics out loud and receive feedback from others, which I found really
difficult at first, but when I realized that no one was going to hurl tomatoes
at me, I gave it a shot. It helped me become very honest with my lyrics as well
as take the time to make sure my audience understood just what it is I set out
to say. Sometimes it was emotional and, at times, very funny. Each of us became
fearless as the class rolled on.
There
were also a few 'new age' workshops for those who wanted to explore certain
things like auras, tonings, and chantings as well as interesting interplays to
color your voice and open up your mind. It's all related. Each instructor had
his or her own interesting, educational, and entertaining information to impart
to us. We had the best instructors (take a look at the Summersongs, Inc.
website and read those bios!).
The
idea of participating in this experience is to take what you want from the
camp. You can enjoy just spending the time on your own, jump into it all, or
find somewhere in between. We walked a lot (bring your tennis shoes and a lightweight
gig bag for your guitar!) and there were quiet places everywhere if you wanted
to sit on a bench and write.
This
time something clicked for me at this camp. By the second day, words and music
ideas were pouring out of me left and right. By the fourth day I had four songs
either started or halfway done. I knew I'd finish them once I got home, which I
did. On the next to last day, a song found me, grabbed me, and wouldn't let go.
I spent most of the day writing it, forgoing workshop participation. I felt
compelled to write this tune and was writing it all the way up to 7 p.m., 10
minutes before I was supposed to go on at the evening Open Mic. All these
serious songs had been coming to me at the camp, but the last song was purely
ridiculous, a totally bizarre novelty tune. I wondered where it come from. I
was glad I chose to do that one at Open Mic, despite the fact that I had to
read scribbled lyrics and try to remember the bizarre melody I put to it.
The
instructors were there to guide us. They don't write the songs for us, they
help us find our voice and tap into our muse. Some folks who were there had
never written anything before, not even a poem, or else they had just started
playing an instrument, but they got just as much out of the camp as I did,
perhaps more.
We
all came away from camp learning a bit more about ourselves. It was an
especially poignant time because Penny Nichols, SummerSongs' director and
founder, was battling cancer so she was unable to be at that session although
she did keep in touch with some of the group via laptop exchanges when she
could. She referenced everything in such wonderful 'nautical' terms, I thought
she really was at sea! However, those who knew her situation soon filled me in.
Penny was on a serious medical journey. I'm happy to say that she is now back
on 'land' and doing very well! She'll be back this year.
My Muse is alive and well because of
SummerSongs. I've written four more songs since last summer and have started
others, so I know there are a many more songs to come. I have a long way to go
to become good at the craft, but how wonderful to have another new hobby in
this 'beginning of my second chapter' in life!
To learn more about these
songwriting retreats, go to www.summersongs.com.
Photo: Jaynee Thorne